Week 4 College Football Schedule Guide: Don’t Watch This; Watch That

Last week, Arizona State went to Texas State and narrowly survived, with a 31-28 win following a second half that took a lot of the air out of a 21-21 halftime score. (It was a game you were told to watch; not that I’m keeping track or anything.)

It got me thinking, though, how rare it might be for a Power 5 team to visit a lesser G5* school. And, since this is a Big Ten blog...well, you get the conceit of this week’s piece.
*I should note, here: I exclude Notre Dame (obviously) and BYU (less obviously) from this list. There are only a couple teams for whom the BYU Exemption is relevant.

A note on methodology: I mean true road games. As in the team takes a bus to Ypsilanti—not Ford Field or some similar larger site—and plays the game in the stadium of the home team. I also mean “the school was a G5 team when the game happened.” That will be readily apparent but will account for the shifting Big XII (hint).

If you’d like to guess which Big Ten team has gone the LONGEST since visiting a G5 school OR who the last G5 team your favorite squad visited for a true roadie, here’s the space (about 15 lines worth of periods) to do so.

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Big Ten teams and their most recent visit to a G5 school:

Illinois: 2019

def. UConn Huskies, 31-23

If you think this is pathetic...well, just wait.

Indiana: 2022

lost at Cincinnati Bearcats, 45-24

In their final year in the AAC, Cincinnati was coming off a College Football Playoff appearance (and 27-6 pasting by Alabama). Indiana was fading fast under Tom Allen and had just brought in Walt Bell to right the offensive ship. It...uh...well, you get it.

Cincinnati—led by quarterback Ben Bryant—broke the Hoosiers’ back in the second quarter with a 32-yard touchdown pass with 32 seconds left in the first half, followed by this example of “the announcer’s jinx”:

Could barely get “self-inflicted wounds” out of his mouth before WHOOPSIE.

Iowa: 2002

def. Miami-Ohio Redhawks, 29-24

This Iowa team went to the Orange Bowl, which feels offensive.

Weirdly, “offensive” was the right word to define Iowa—just not in the way we think of today.

Behind QB Brad Banks and RB Fred Russell, the Hawkeyes were not held under 100 rushing yards all season—in fact, their lowest was 119 in an Orange Bowl loss to USC. They ran for 365 yards against Minnesota. They went into Ann Arbor and beat the #8 Wolverines 34-9.

It makes the 5-point win over Miami Hydroxide all the more baffling. The Redhawks had Ben Roethlisberger and had beaten North Carolina in Chapel Hill, but it wasn’t supposed to go down like this. Yet Big Ben threw for 343 as Terry Hoeppner all but abandoned the ground game—it was two picks and a back-breaking Iowa drive that ran the last five minutes off the clock that salted things away in Oxford.

It also feels noteworthy that this game was in 2002. Since then Iowa’s been comfortable to rest on their laurels of playing Noted Juggernaut Iowa State every year—outside a brief series with Pitt. That’s as spicy as Kirk Ferentz will get.

Maryland: 2022

def. Charlotte 49ers, 56-21

Charlotte’s bad, this was dumb, and I won’t dwell on this any further.

Michigan: 2013

def. UConn, 24-21

In retrospect, maybe Brady Hoke didn’t have his shit all together.

Starting the season ranked #17 behind new QB Devin Gardner, the Wolverines pasted Central Michigan and beat #14 Notre Dame, rising to #11, before narrowly escaping Akron in the Big House.

They dropped to #15 in the country.

Maybe it was justified.

UConn took a 14-7 lead into the half and widened it to 21-7 when the Huskies returned a Gardner fumble for a touchdown. Two touchdowns from Fitzgerald Toussaint and a strong defensive effort saved the Wolverines, though, while the visiting Michigan faithful set an attendance record at Rentschler Field.

The Wolverines dropped to #19 in the country after this one.

They were 4-0 and had fallen in the rankings from the season’s start.

They finished the year 7-6 (3-5) after getting pasted by Kansas State in the Buffalo Wild Wings Bowl.

Michigan State: 2015

def. Western Michigan Broncos, 37-24

Celebrating the State, the #5 Spartans headed down I-69 to visit the PJ Fleck-led Broncos, who that season would ROW their way to a Bahamas Bowl title.*
*The Fightin’ Flecks also claim a 2015 MAC West Co-Championship—what is it with PJ Fleck and pulling this shit? Did they get rings done up, too?

Minnesota: 2019

def. Fresno State Bulldogs, 38-35, 2OT

A definitely-not-fraudulent Minnesota team, fresh off a 28-21 shellacking of South Dakota State, traveled to Fresno and survived only when future NFL draftee Antoine Winfield Jr. picked off a Fresno pass in the Gophers end zone in the second overtime.

The Gophers would go on to convince everyone they were for real the following week, with a rousing 35-32 pasting of Georgia Southern.

Nebraska: 2014

def. Fresno State, 55-19

To give you an idea how long ago this was...it was Bo Pelini’s last year. Tommy Armstrong threw three touchdown passes, Demornay Pierson-El ran a punt back, and Nebraska took a delightful 27-5 lead into halftime thanks to one of the stupidest safeties I’ve ever seen:

Punting is winning. Or something like that.

Northwestern: 2011

lost at Army Black Knights, 21-14

I was going to go to this game, because some NUMBalums were joining a SailGate, in which they had booked a boat to take them from New York up the Hudson to West Point.

Instead, I chickened out and stayed on campus, because the marching band had a performance: standing on the Lakefill in full uniform, playing the fight song and other tunes while the Athletics Department provided free food for students and projected the game on a couple portable jumbotrons.

It was a ghost town by the fourth quarter. This was the dumbest goddamn thing.

Always go to the game.

Ohio State: 2002***

def. Cincinnati***, 23-19

OK. I had to break the rules.

Ohio State has two games since World War II that would even remotely qualify here: at Cincinnati’s Paul Brown Stadium—not its true home, Nippert Stadium—or a 1977 road game at SMU, then of the Southwest Conference. So unless you want to split hairs on the 1950s Pitt Panthers or get into whether the 1943 Great Lakes Navy squad should qualify, we’re just gonna call it here. Deal?

Cincinnati was in C-USA back then and put an almighty scare in the #6 Buckeyes, who needed a late interception to escape with a 23-19 win.

Oregon: 2017

def. Wyoming Cowboys, 49-13

Oregon scored 28 points in the second quarter alone, and this one was over by halftime.

Penn State: 2015

lost at Temple Owls, 27-10

There is literally only one thing you care about here:

That Temple team, for what it’s worth, won 10 games, the AAC East Division, and lost to 13-1 Tom Herman-coached Houston in the AAC Championship. Coached by some guy named “Rhule”. Wonder what happened to him.

Purdue: 2021

def. UConn, 49-0!!!

This Purdue team went 9-4!!! They beat Tennessee in the Music City Bowl!!!

This honest-to-goodness feels so long ago that someone could just be playing an elaborate prank on me.

But hey guys? Why do we keep going to Connecticut? Is this like some 30 Rock thing where if you film it there, the tax benefits are substantial?

I don’t get it.

(PS: Have we done a 30 Rock Power Poll? Should we?)

Rutgers: 2022

def. Temple, 16-14

Rutgers’s only touchdown was a pick-six. They gained 201 yards. Greg Schiano became the winningest coach in Rutgers history. That about sums it up.

UCLA: 2024

def. Hawai’i Rainbow Warriors, 16-13

I remember it like it was a month ago!

USC: 2013

def. Hawai’i, 30-13

Some of you may complain that the 2019 game at BYU should count. Or maybe you don’t care and stopped reading long ago.

USC took a similarly-delightful 20-5 lead into half down at the old Aloha Bowl—and they actually trailed 5-3 after Hawai’i sacked Cody Kessler in the end zone, then tacked on a field goal on the ensuing drive. Thankfully for USC coach Lane Kiffin (!!!), the Trojans ran for 192 yards, because Kessler and backup Max Wittek were not good quarterbacks.

Washington: 2015

lost at #23 Boise State Broncos, 16-13

There was something in the Pac-12’s water in 2019, as Washington also went to BYU for a game.

In this case, the Broncos took a 16-0 halftime lead and hung on as Washington found 13 points of its own in the second half. This was Chris Petersen’s return home after taking the Washington job.

wisconsin: 2019

def. South Florida Brahman Bulls, 49-0

I want to say this one was delayed a ridiculously long time for weather? I might just be misremembering that, though. And I’m sure as hell not looking up a 49-point badger win.

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Congratulations to Ohio State and Iowa, and I hope the rest of you learned something.

Who’s got awesome games like these in the future?

According to FBSchedules...

• Indiana: at UConn (2026)
• Maryland: at UConn (2026) — yes, lol, that’s two B1G teams to UConn in 2026
• Northwestern: at Tulane (2025)
• Penn State: at Temple (2026)
• UCLA: at UNLV (2025), at Hawai’i (2027) — genuinely think their AD doesn’t care, as there are also multiple future trips to Mountain West schools making the jump to the PAC-12.

Thursday Night

Don’t Watch This

Glenville State Pioneers at Fairmont State Fightin’ Falcons [6pm, MEtv]
Edward Waters at Benedict College [7pm, ESPN2]

{NFL} New England Patriots at New York Jets [7:15pm, Prime]

{Honduras} Real Espana vs. Victoria [8:30pm, FOX Deportes]

Watch That

South Alabama Jaguars at Appalachian State Mountaineers

6:30pm | ESPN | App State -7.5 | O/U 62.5

#1 Harding Bisons at Arkansas-Monticello Weevils

6pm | YouTube

{VB} #6 Purdue at #10 Kansas [6:30pm, ESPN+]

This is hardly the most exciting slate you’ve ever seen, with just one FBS game—1-2 South Alabama, who beat Northwestern State 87-10 last week but have lost to North Texas and Ohio, versus 2-1 Appalachian State, who’s beaten East Tennessee State and squeaked one out against East Carolina, but gotten pasted 66-20 by Clemson.

Neither team is terribly good on defense, appears competent enough on offense, and that’s enough for me. Beats listening to Al Michaels breathlessly recount how Aaron Rodgers spent two weeks naked in a waterfall to focus his mind and Kirk Herbstreit to opine “that’s just what makes this guy a winner” before going back to a shot of his dog so you forget how bad the broadcast actually is.

Here is the Arkansas-Monticello Boll Weevil mascot, Weezie the Weevil:

Mascot Hall of Fame

Did you know, though, that there’s a female counterpart to Weezie the Weevil named “Blossom” (and that all the women’s teams at UAM are called the Blossoms)?

UAM Facebook

That’s a sexy-ass weevil right there.

Friday Night

Don’t Watch This

Stanford Cardinal at Syracuse Orange (-8.5, O/U 57.5) [6:30pm, ESPN]

{CPL} York vs. Cavalry [7pm, FS2]
{Liga MX} Atlas vs. Queretaro [8pm, TUDN]

Watch That

{FH} #6 Iowa at #1 Northwestern [3pm, BTN]

#24 Illinois Fighting Illini at #22 Nebraska Cornhuskers

7pm | FOX | UNL -7.5 | O/U 42.5

San Jose State Spartans at Washington State Cougars

9pm | The CW | WSU -12 | O/U 55.5

Frankly, this is the good shit. All around. Start with the Crayola Bowl—Cardinal vs. Orange—as a little appeteaser, if you need, before NEBRNOIS kicks off and probably angers us all. Then after a very special episode of Blossom on The CW, why not stick around for San Jose State at Wazzu, the first of Wazzu’s scheduling obligations to Mountain West teams?

That’s college football right there, baby.

Saturday Morning

Don’t Watch This

Marshall Thundering Herd at #3 Ohio State Buckeyes (-40, O/U 51.5) [11am, FOX]
NC State Wolfpack at #21 Clemson Tigers (-20.5, O/U 46.5) [11am, ABC]
Florida Gators (-6, O/U 58.5) at Mississippi State Bulldogs [11am, ESPN]
Charlotte 49ers at Indiana Hoosiers (-28.5, O/U 48.5) [11am, BTN]
Villanova Wildcats at Maryland Terrapins [11am, BTN]
James Madison Dukes at North Carolina Tar Heels (-10.5, O/U 47.5) [11am, ACCN]
Houston Cougars at Cincinnati Bearcats (-3.5, O/U 46.5) [11am, FS1]
Kansas Jayhawks at West Virginia Mountaineers (-2.5, O/U 56.5) [11am, ESPN2]
Tulane Green Wave (-3, O/U 54.5) at Louisiana Ragin’ Cajuns [11am, ESPNU]
Rice Owls at Army Black Knights (-6, O/U 42.5) [11am, CBSSN]
Ohio Bobcats at Kentucky Wildcats (-19.5, O/U 41.5) [11:45am, SECN]
Balls Tate Robotbirds at FIRE UP CHIPS (-6.5, O/U 53.5) [12pm, ESPN+]

{EPL} Crystal Palace vs. Manchester United [11:30am, NBC]

Watch That

Go outside. Take a nice walk.

These games are absolute butt. What’s the best game here—Kansas at West Virginia? Jalon Daniels is due for his season-ending injury. Florida at Clanga? I mean, there’s dead man walking and then there’s Billy Napier. Snore. Tulane at Louisiana? Maybe the Green Wave are your best bet here. Or perhaps this is the “other” game a year where you watch Army.

Yeah, Army. Maybe that’d be fun.

Or just take a nice walk. Tell your family you love them.

Saturday Afternoon

Don’t Watch This

Arkansas State Red Wolves at #20 Iowa State Cyclones (-21.5, O/U 51.5) [1pm, ESPN+]
Virginia Cavaliers (-3.5, O/U 55.5) at Coastal Carolina Chanticleers [1pm, ESPN+]
Utah State Aggies (-6.5, O/U 53.5) at Temple Owls [1pm, ESPN+]
St. Francis (PA) Red Flash at Eastern Michigan Eagles [1pm, ESPN+]
Southern Miss Golden Iggles at Jacksonville State Gamecocks (-6, O/U 60.5) [2pm, ESPN+]
Eastern Washington Eagles at Nevada Wolf Pack [2pm, MWN]
Kent State Golden Flashes at #10 Penn State Nittany Lions (-49, O/U 56.5) [2:30pm, BTN]
#11 USC Trojans (-5.5, O/U 44.5) at #18 Michigan Wolverines [2:30pm, CBS]
UCLA Bruins at #16 LSU Tigers (-24, O/U 56.5) [2:30pm, ABC]
Miami Hydroxide Redhawks at #17 Notre Dame Fighting Irish (-28, O/U 43.5) [2:30pm, NBC]
Buffalo Bulls at #23 NIU Huskies (-14, O/U 43.5) [2:30pm, ESPN+]
Arkansas Razorbacks at Auburn Tigers (-3, O/U 56.5) [2:30pm, ESPN]
Rutgers Scarlet Knights at Virginia Tech Hokies (-3.5, O/U 44.5) [2:30pm, ACCN]
Youngstown State Penguins at Pittsburgh Panthers [2:30pm, ACCNX]
Memphis Tigers (-10, O/U 50.5) at Navy Midshipmen [2:30pm, CBSSN]
Houston Baptist Huskies at UTSA Roadrunners [2:30pm, ESPN+]
#12 Utah Utes at #14 Oklahoma State Cowboys (-2.5, O/U 52.5) [3pm, FOX]
Duke Blue Devils (-14.5, O/U 51.5) at Middle Tennessee Blue Raiders [3pm, ESPNU]
Vanderbilt Commodores at #7 Missouri Tigers (-20, O/U 53.5) [3:15pm, SECN]
UTEP Miners at Colorado State Rams (-9.5, O/U 50.5) [4pm, truTV/MAX]

Watch That

Georgia Tech Yellow Jackets at #19 Louisville Cardinals

2:30pm | ESPN2 | Lhvl -10 | O/U 57.5

Arizona State Sun Devils at Texas Tech Red Raiders

2:30pm | FS1 | TTU -3 | O/U 59.5

TCU Horned Frogs at SMU Cocaineponies

4pm | The CW | TCU -3 | O/U 58.5 | IRON SKILLET

After the last three SKILLET GAMES had been decided by a touchdown or less and included no fewer than 76 combined points, 2023 cooled off, with TCU pasting the Ponies, 34-17. It was the first time since 2016 the winner hadn’t scored at least 40 points.

There’s reason to be concerned again this year: TCU has been fine, narrowly escaping a game Stanford club and falling by a point last week to UCF in a Watch That game. But SMU looked bad against Nevada and got choked out, 18-15, by BYU two weeks ago in University Park.

In a world where Wyoming is no longer drunk fun at elevation, San Jose State is going through some stuff, and Hawai’i isn’t providing reasons to tune in late, we need this. COME ON, IRON SKILLET. WE NEED THIS.

Also: no idea why Georgia Tech is 10-point road dogs to the Fightin’ Brohms. They lost by 3 on the road to Syracuse—a defensible loss!—and Lhvl has pasted Austin Peay and Jacksonville State. That’s it. Jackets cover and might win outright.

Saturday Evening

Don’t Watch This

Monmouth Hawks at FIU Sunblazers [5pm, ESPN+]
East Carolina plays (+6, O/U 54.5) [5pm, ESPN+]
#8 Miami Fluoride Hurricanes (-16.5, O/U 54.5) at USF Brahman Bulls [6pm, ESPN]
Florida A&M Rattlers at Troy Trojans [6pm, ESPN+]
Tulsa Golden Hurricane at Louisiana Tech Bulldogs (-3, O/U 57.5) [6pm, ESPN+]
New Mexico State Aggies at Sam Houston State Bearkats (-16.5, O/U 44.5) [6pm, ESPN+]
Wyoming Cowboys at North Texas Mean Green (-9, O/U 55.5) [6pm, ESPN+]
Northwestern Wildcats at Washington Huskies (-10.5, O/U 42.5) [6pm, BTN]
#6 Tennessee Volunteers (-7, O/U 57.5) at #15 Oklahoma Sooners [6:30pm, ABC]
Bowling Green Falcons at #25 Texas A&M Aggies (-23, O/U 52.5) [6:30pm, SECN+]
Akron Zips at South Carolina Gamecocks (-28, O/U 45.5) [6:30pm, ESPNU]
Georgia Southern Eagles at #5 Ole Miss Rebels (-35, O/U 66.5) [6:45pm, SECN]
UL Monroe Warhawks at #1 Texas Longhorns (-44.5, O/U 52.5) [7pm, SECN+]
Michigan State Spartans at Boston College Eagles (-6.5, O/U 42.5) [7pm, ACCN]
Baylor Bears at Colorado Buffaloes (-1.5, O/U 51.5) [7pm, FOX]
#4 Idaho Vandals at #23 Abilene Christian Wildcats [7pm, ESPN+]
Fresno State Bulldogs (-15, O/U 61.5) at New Mexico Lobos [7:30pm, truTV/MAX]

Watch That

California Golden Bears at Florida State Seminoles

6pm | ESPN2 | FSU -2.5 | O/U 44.5

Toledo Rockets at Western Kentucky Hilltoppers

6pm | ESPN+ | Toledo -2.5 | O/U 62.5

#21 SEMO State Redhawks at #7 Southern Illinois Salukis

6pm | ESPN+ | WAR FOR THE WHEEL

Purdue Boilermakers at Oregon State Beavers

7:30pm | The CW | ORSt -4.5 | O/U 50.5

It feels slightly criminal that I made this article all about “P5 teams going to G5 schools” and then Miami Fluoride-at-USF is listed as a “Don’t Watch”. But that’s just a general rule about Miami Fluoride, not a statement on that particular game. I dunno that the Hurricanes are quite “8th in the nation” material, given that the bloom’s pretty much off their one rose, a whuppin’ put on Florida, but do you. USF didn’t look bad at Alabama and could cover if QB Byrum Brown is game.

Enough about that. LOOK AT THESE “WATCH THAT” GAMES, because we’ve got both the “point and laugh” and the “point in awe” stuff here.

• Point and Laugh: Cal at Florida State. The Bears faithful have gotten real frisky on Twitter—and Write for California has you covered there—following their 21-14 victory over Auburn, and either they win and the Calgorithm continues at FSU’s expense, or they lose and it gets ugly. Either way: good for a chuckle or two.
• Point in Awe: Let’s take a look at last week’s DWT...

• Point in Awe: THE WAR FOR THE WHEEL. Two ranked teams. A 43-40-8 lifetime series. A one-point SIU win in 2023, a three-point SEMO win in 2022, a three-point SIU win in 2020, a four-point SEMO win in 2018, and totals of 68 and 70 in the 2021 and 2019 games. Hell, the game’s called in Cape Girardeau on REAL ROCK 99.3 [guitar riff]. LET’S GO.
• Point and Laugh: Neither Oregon State nor Purdue really showed up last week for big rivalry games against the in-state talent. Now, as a treat to all of us for being good boys and girls, we get to watch them slap-fight it out on The CW. I can’t wait to find out what battles Dean’s going to brood his way through on next week’s Summerville. Or are there any new Lori Laughlin vehicles out there?

Please, Seek Help

FAU Owls at UConn Huskies

6pm | CBSSN | UConn -2.5 | O/U 46.5

Iowa Hawkeyes at Minnesota Golden Gophers

6:30pm | NBC | Iowa -2.5 | O/U 35.5

WE GOT BONUS SATURDAY EVENING CONTENT FOR YOU!

Minnesota’s doing a “Maroon Out” and while I’m sure this will look cool to some of y’all, as a colorblind individual it’s just gonna look like an Iowa home game.

UConn should just revive the Civil COnFLict with FAU and see if anyone notices.

It’s late and I’m drunk...

Don’t Watch This

Portland State Vikings at Boise State Broncos [8:45pm, FS1]
Utah Tech Trailblazers at #12 UC Davis Aggies [9pm, ESPN+]

lots of soccer on, too

Watch That

#13 Kansas State Wildcats at BYU Cougars

9:30pm | ESPN | KSU -6.5 | O/U 48.5

#19 Northern Iowa Panthers at Hawai’i Rainbow Warriors

10:59pm | Team1Sports

I’m at 3222 words. Again. You don’t actually read this shit, do you?

Here’s your reward: perhaps my spirit animal, in “World Capitals” form.

No line out for it yet, but I’m convinced UNI will be no worse than a one-score underdog to Hawai’i...and I might be ready to predict a Panthers win. Let’s see what tomorrow brings.

Alright I teach in like 5 minutes across campus, gotta go. Enjoy the games. Congrats to Iowa and Ohio State for being chickenshits.